Pervasive friendship

I would like to share about how my friendships have been empowered since I started to rely on the support of Balanced View‘s support network, the Four Mainstays of open intelligence.
There used to be quite a lot of confusion for me, surrounding friendship. I was always looking for closeness and reliability in my friends, but I often felt something was lacking, something was uncomfortable or that I wasn’t completely able to be myself. Today, so much has changed here. Just the other day, when a friend was feeling sad, I said to her in complete assurance that I will always, always be her friend and that she can count on me for life. To know that I will always be able to be there for her is amazing for me, and I see that it is possible because I am no longer ruled by my negative data streams. In the past, if I felt unworthy or angry, I would sometimes end friendships but today I have a stability and reliability that is so beyond my positive or negative data streams. This I feel allows for true friendship, friendship that is not dependent on having similar opinions or experiences.

When I feel that something is lacking or uncomfortable in friendships today, I just relax and recognise that that unease is equally pervaded by ever-comfortable, relaxed open intelligence and that nothing, not me or anything else, has to change. I can be naturally loving and present just as I am, comfortable or uncomfortable, and before I know it the unease has changed into something else. I no longer feel that I have to be confirmed or recognised by my friends as a particular personal identity and because of that, I am so much more available to be spontaneous and available to enjoy and support my friends.

Today I know that my true well-being is not to be found in any outer circumstance, not even in loving relationships, and it is a huge relief to not have to put this expectation on any of my friends. I enjoy them and the relationships so much more now that I’m not looking for them to provide me with the sense of being loved, or seen for “who I am”, whatever that means 🙂 I often feel very relaxed and easy-going when I am with my friends—instead of playing out jealousy, unworthiness or disappointment like I used to. My friends, new and old, tell me that they feel very relaxed and open when they’re with me and I know this is because of the openness and relaxation I feel within myself, which is awakened by open intelligence.

Thank you for a beautiful relationship with my mum


For many years my relationship with my mum had felt like a war zone. A place of repeated misunderstanding and painful interactions for both of us. Before I met the Balanced View Training, I was having therapy sessions and was practicing telling my mum exactly what she had done to hurt me (this time) and why it hurt, on frequent occasions. My mum found this difficult, and so did I, because it just didn’t feel natural to keep drumming up these conversations and basically trying to change my mum so that I could feel okay.

It was amazing then to meet the Balanced View Training and receive the instruction to let people be as they are, to let my data (thoughts, emotions, sensations, experiences) be as it is and to simply relax for short moments as often as I could remember. I also participated in the Twelve Empowerments Training and chose to take support from a Balanced View trainer.

Over the last six years my relationship with my mum has completely flourished. We literally could not spend more than a couple of hours together without saying something hurtful, whereas now we enjoy our time together, we go for coffee and I share love and appreciation for all that she has contributed to me.

Even when my mum reacts and loses her temper, I don’t take it personally. I can simply relax and see how I can support her to do the same. I am much more open when criticism comes my way which allows me to understand where she is coming from and thank her for her insights and requests, when in previous years, what felt like criticism would have gone straight to my heart and I would have indulged anger and sadness, believing my mum didn’t love me, when in fact, she was just doing her very best to express her wishes in the only way she has learned how.

It is such a gift to discover that my mum is also doing her very best to be of benefit and to honor this with gratitude even when my thoughts and feelings are going wild in the opposite direction. By relying on open intelligence I am empowered to see I am fundamentally perfect just as I am, and to see this about others too. The natural stability I experience, no matter what comes up, is unaffected by any data, so I can respond to all situations with an open heart and the clear-seeing of a balanced view. It is such a gift and I am incredibly grateful for the Balanced View teaching in my life, for my trainer and for everything Candice has done to ensure all relationships can be harmonized and enjoyed, just as human beings were always born to live together in a beautiful, wonder-filled way. The love I feel in my heart for my mum when I think of her now is the love I feel for everyone in the world and it is incredible to consider what the world would look like if everyone was relying on open intelligence, knowing the true nature of data.

With love,


Gratitude for Balanced View Bristol and heart-warming community

My first experience of a Balanced View Open Meeting was accidentally wandering into the end of one whilst searching for another meeting at Hamilton House, Bristol.

I had heard about Balanced View before but had all these ideas about what it would be like. I’d imagined being in a therapy circle, theatrically acting out my issues with a small group of others.

When I walked into that room, it was a suprise to be met by a buzzing group of people, all chatting and smiling with a really fresh energy about them. I had missed the talk but was so touched by what I’d experienced. I knew I’d be back for more.

Interestingly, I had spent the last two years searching for a community where I really felt at home. I had been involved with activist groups, dance groups, permaculture groups (Bristol has a group for every interest!). But I just couldn’t find what I was looking for.

Meeting the Balanced View community in Bristol was the end of the search. I had finally met a group of people who let be exactly as I am. No matter how I felt I could show up to the meetings, be invited to hang out, meals at people’s houses, movie nights, there was always something fun to do and lovely people to be with.

Through being allowed to be as I was, feeling depressed, lonely, socially anxious, completely in love, and always being completely welcome, the community supported me to love myself.

There is always the priority of recognizing open intelligence and using the Four Mainstays support to empower this recognition. I just loved this. I love learning how to use my mind in a beneficial way. I love harmonious relating, where I decide not to emphasize my thoughts and emotions and just relax to let it all flow by.

I love seeing the results and being with people who are completely authentic and trustworthy. Everything is allowed to be as it is and I have found this so healing and empowering, because from the mountain top of seeing it all and feeling it all deeply, it is obvious to me what is of most benefit and how I can serve each situation in the best way.

I am just so grateful to Candice O’Denver for her gift of empowering people and communities to flourish together, peacefully and powerfully. I feel excited about what is possible for the world, seeing the solution directly in my own experience and in the experience of many others, it is obvious that human beings are born to live this way.

Skye, Bristol

Outshining Painful Thoughts at Extract the Power 12!

 Etp_banner_Nov 2015

I had the recent opportunity to participate in a Balanced View Training in Bristol called Extract the Power 12. This is the eleventh time I have participated in this bi-annual Gathering and each time it is so powerful and empowering.

It is amazing to be in the context of the Four Mainstays where the entire focus is on gaining assurance in open intelligence and contributing strengths, gifts and talents for the benefit of all.

Everything comes up for me in this context because I have spent my life limiting myself with the belief that I am  not good enough, that I have nothing to contribute and that other people are so much better than me, and then trying to change this experience by attempting to make myself appear better than others.

This is such painful way to live and has led to relationship breakdowns and a life of dissatisfaction and misery.

What I love about the Balanced View Training is that I have had the opportunity to recognize all these belief systems, thoughts and emotions to be the beneficial lively energy of the open intelligence we all are and have immediate access to with short moments of complete relaxation.

When I completely relax my mind, no matter how jealous or depressed I am feeling everything pools into the pure light of open intelligence. There is nothing to grasp onto. The thoughts are just a mirage and indivisible from all experience is the great stability and wellness of open intelligence.

I love the Balanced View metaphor for the mind, how open intelligence is like a crystal ball, completely unaffected by its reflections. Capable of holding all reflections: ugliness, anger, hatred, joy, everything can appear and open intelligence remains crystal clear.

Through showing up to this Extract the Power Training and the continuous empowerment of the Four Mainstays lifestyle I now experience a capacity to show up beneficially no matter what I am feeling or thinking. I see I have a choice. I can withdraw into the misery of the descriptions in my mind or I can choose to recognize open intelligence and be unaffected. I can be warm, openhearted, available, and I can focus on solutions.

This is my choice, and I am so grateful to Candice O’Denver and the Balanced View Training for showing me I have this choice and then for empowering me to see that I shine and life and is completely wonderful when I make it.

If you would like to read more about the Extract the Power event, with lots of shares and photos, here is a link to the Facebook event.

Thank you to Candice O’Denver for the gift of outshining painful thoughts and empowering my capacity to contribute benefit…

Thank you to Candice O’Denver and Balanced View

I wake up every morning feeling incredibly grateful to Candice O’Denver and Balanced View that I know how to access the open intelligence we all are and share inseparably from each other and all beings.

I didn’t conventionally ‘succeed’ in school, I was considered a drop out. Balanced View has shown me a way to use my mind that gives me the knowledge, skills and capacity to contribute great benefit in any and all situations.

Through the simple practice of complete relaxation, short moments to relax my mind, I naturally feel confident and assured. I am able to understand others, to actually listen and to respond in a way that truly serves and is appreciated.

Whatever thought, emotion or sensation I experience, it doesn’t matter. I simply return again and again to this simple practice, and I use the Four Mainstays empowerment network. Thousands of people all over the world, with trainers, trainings and media available to empower intelligence for the benefit of all.

In all of my life I have never met such incredible people as the trainers, leaders and participants of Balanced View.

I have always wanted to see a solution for world peace, and this is what I see in people who choose to rely on the Four Mainstays. I see people who focus on benefit and naturally contribute with an open heart. I see people who express love and care in a way I had never experienced before. I am completely exalted and empowered to shine with my strengths, gifts and talents. This is truly the best life and instead of fearing and hating human beings I now see people are innately of benefit, born to contribute brilliance and love to each other and our precious world.

I am so grateful to Candice for giving everything so that all human beings can come to know this for themselves.

Thank you for reading 🙂

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