Being asked to contribute to the blog today has very significant resonance with me as this week I attended the funeral of my ex husband which before Balanced View I would have found very traumatic on many levels.
My present husband asked me to be clear about my motives for attending and I tried to be honest as I wanted to show solidarity with my children and also to pay my respects to their late father. What I had not considered were all the various ramifications involved.
It brought up all the old ideas for me regarding who and what God is. I was unable to see the Catholic Mass being performed as having the same relevance to the life of the father of my children I would formerly have believed. It would have been easy for me to have felt like an outsider as nearly everyone there except me went up to receive the Eucharist since because I was divorced I was now considered excommunicated from being Catholic. I kept remembering that nothing can remove the natural life power that is Open Intelligence and that there is no need to feel you are separate or better than if you are a ‘religious person’. Or that you possess a knowledge that is exclusive. All of that is learned and not who we truly are.
During the whole day what surfaced for me was ‘there is only this, there is no separation. There is only Open Intelligence.’ However later my physical state betrayed me as my heart was racing that night and I could not sleep, I almost wanted the comfort of what religion calls the heavenly father figure..
But the practice of short moments did come to the rescue, and I knew I was not ‘cast out’ or ‘excommunicated’ and could stand apart and yet be emotionally and mentally stable through my Balanced View practice.