I would like to share about how my friendships have been empowered since I started to rely on the support of Balanced View‘s support network, the Four Mainstays of open intelligence.
There used to be quite a lot of confusion for me, surrounding friendship. I was always looking for closeness and reliability in my friends, but I often felt something was lacking, something was uncomfortable or that I wasn’t completely able to be myself. Today, so much has changed here. Just the other day, when a friend was feeling sad, I said to her in complete assurance that I will always, always be her friend and that she can count on me for life. To know that I will always be able to be there for her is amazing for me, and I see that it is possible because I am no longer ruled by my negative data streams. In the past, if I felt unworthy or angry, I would sometimes end friendships but today I have a stability and reliability that is so beyond my positive or negative data streams. This I feel allows for true friendship, friendship that is not dependent on having similar opinions or experiences.
When I feel that something is lacking or uncomfortable in friendships today, I just relax and recognise that that unease is equally pervaded by ever-comfortable, relaxed open intelligence and that nothing, not me or anything else, has to change. I can be naturally loving and present just as I am, comfortable or uncomfortable, and before I know it the unease has changed into something else. I no longer feel that I have to be confirmed or recognised by my friends as a particular personal identity and because of that, I am so much more available to be spontaneous and available to enjoy and support my friends.
Today I know that my true well-being is not to be found in any outer circumstance, not even in loving relationships, and it is a huge relief to not have to put this expectation on any of my friends. I enjoy them and the relationships so much more now that I’m not looking for them to provide me with the sense of being loved, or seen for “who I am”, whatever that means 🙂 I often feel very relaxed and easy-going when I am with my friends—instead of playing out jealousy, unworthiness or disappointment like I used to. My friends, new and old, tell me that they feel very relaxed and open when they’re with me and I know this is because of the openness and relaxation I feel within myself, which is awakened by open intelligence.
I would like to share this time about the immense shifts I have seen with regards to studying. Two years ago, I took a break from university studies. There were many reasons for the decision, one of them that I felt exhausted from the seeming never-ending efforting and striving to pass the next exam. I also noticed I didn’t have a clear motivation as to what I was doing at university; it just seemed to be what most people were doing and I sort of went along with what I and other people expected of me.
During these two years, my main heart-focus and priority in life has been to immerse myself in the Four Mainstays lifestyle of Balanced View: I have travelled to the Centers in Sweden, India and the US, I have passionately been involved in service to Balanced View, in my local community and I have deepened the relationship with my personal Balanced View-trainer.
Returning to university, wow, the shift is huge. For one, there is no more vagueness about what I am doing there: through the relationship with the trainer and the natural clarity that comes about through relying on open intelligence, it has been a carefully, lovingly considered decision of what will bring most benefit to me and to all. It isn’t anymore a “me-project” focused on achieving some self identity and repeatedly having to prove myself as worthy and intelligent, like it used to be. There is so much light-heartedness, natural curiosity and ease, paired with clarity and power in all the listening, reading and writing. I am so very much more efficient and powerful when there is not the constant commentary of “Oh, didn’t have time for that yet” or “How will I ever manage all of this”, instead I naturally and spontaneously go to solutions and action.
The term “rest and get busy” has become my experience over these last weeks, and wow, I am so grateful for this. I also see I have learned so much from service in Balanced View. Many times when taking on a new service role and learning something new, I may have felt overwhelmed, resistant and bored, but the wish to contribute and the framework of relaxation has supported me to continue on and these data streams have opened wide up. Now when I face them at university, they don’t hold the same power at all. I see I can take with me my motivation to benefit all in every circumstance and activity, be it in service or at university, and this makes studying so much more cheerful and relaxed.
I would like to share about how sleep and sleeplessness has been empowered since I have been relying on the Balanced View Four Mainstays lifestyle.
Whenever I had a hard time sleeping in the past, there would be full-on affliction for me. With my previous training in psychology, what often came to mind was that there was some trauma (conscious or unaware) that was playing out and not allowing me to relax, that I should have fixed it, self blame, all the stories about what tomorrow would be like, that I wouldn’t be able to be decent to people or productive when I would be tired etc etc. Just a lot going on! And the experience of this affliction made me afraid, for periods of my life, of going to sleep in a negative cycle of sleeplessness accumulating. Ah! What a burden to remember this, and what a relief it is to see yet another area of my life being clarified and eased up through using the support we are offered.
Today, although I still prefer having a perfect night’s sleep, there is no way to deny that open intelligence is shining just as brightly, regardless if I stay awake or not. Instead of emphasising all the stories and tension, I quickly put on a trainer talk, watch a Balanced View video or even get up to write out some of the training text. In this way, the well-being is always on. The following day, if I haven’t got “enough” sleep, I notice I am so much more open to finding both solutions to support myself (go easy, take naps etc) and even be as powerful and productive as I would have if fully rested.
There is really so much power and ease in relying on open intelligence, and I wish for everyone who is open and willing to enjoy the support of this lifestyle.
I would like to share my experience of relying on the support of the Four Mainstays in stress and stress related health issues.
About one year after I met the Balanced View Training I developed symptoms of fatigue, which for me was expressed through much physical and mental tiredness and a poor immune system. Today, almost two years later, I can see the immense benefit I have received from the support of the Mainstays when going through this process.
The first thing that comes to mind is the immediate tool of short moments of relaxation when stress comes up. Rather than having to create certain circumstances, be with certain people or even better alone, and micro manage my life in other ways, short moments have increasingly allowed me to access the relaxation of a warm bath or a yoga class instantaneouysly. Short moments have also helped in connecting to the power and courage to eventually start working and activating myself again, something that, as I understand, is often advised in order to rehabilitate oneself.
My trainer has also been a huge asset for expanding my power and beliefs of what I ”can” and ”cannot” do, where I would otherwise have been totally blind sighted by fear of getting ill again. In the community, I have many powerful role models with similar experiences who inspire my greatly in taking best care of my health, something that more and more is becoming a joy and a pleasure—where before I would always push myself as far as possible.
Taking part of the training, for instance through Clarity Calls has also been a vital part of my everyday life, supporting me to cut the stories of victimhood and fear and instead allow everything to be as it is and trust in the basic goodness of life and that all is fundamentally well. I read a blogpost the other day where someone shared their story of fatigue and when comparing my journey to the victimhood and disempowerment they expressed, I realised just how normalised empowerment and support is in my life, thanks to the Mainstays, and how immensely grateful I am to be continuously supported in this area of my life.
Best wishes on your journey, Beate in Sweden.
Today I would like to share about the increased sense of general life satisfaction and well-being I experience through living the Balanced View Four Mainstays lifestyle. My experience is that there is a more and more constant ”background noise” of excitement in my everyday life. You know that feeling of looking forward to something, of being excited about plans for the weekend or for the summer? That feeling pops up more and more often. I find myself trying to relate it to something exciting in the future or in the past. But usually there isn’t anything specific going on; there’s nothing in the descriptions or the circumstances that’s changed. Rather, the excitement and sense of magic and fun sneaks into everyday, mundane activities. This morning for example, having my morning coffee was, to my surprise, in itself a deeply fulfilling and complete experience. The short moments’ practice in this regard has meant that ordinary experiences have become extra-ordinary; tapping into open intelligence again and again has allowed for natural excitement to light the experience up from the inside. To me this is wonderful to recognise since I always wanted everyday life to be filled with ”presence”, fun and curiosity and looked for it, for example, in the right job—but I was never able to hold the exciting circumstances or feelings in place. Much gratitude to the Four Mainstays for allowing short moments to go continuous! Beate from Sweden.
Dearest newcomer to Balanced View,
Thank you so much for showing an interest in how you can be of most benefit in your life. I have been involved in Balanced View for about two and a half years. Prior to meeting the training it was always very important for me to be (or at least seem) independent in my life: as a woman, as a spiritual seeker etc. I was never interested in taking part in an organisation, I might even have seen it as a failure to “depend” on a teacher or community. Another thing that has always been very important for me is authenticity—to live a true, genuine life of integrity. So here I am today, completely held and flourishing in the Four Mainstays lifestyle, completely held and flourishing in all experiences, painful or cheerful.
What I have found through relying on short moments of relaxation and openness, a never-ending supply of teaching media, my personal open intelligence-guide and the community of people who also want to rely on relaxation and openness is that both these values—independence and authenticity—are more alive in my life than I had ever experienced prior to the training. I am supported to meet all my thoughts and emotions with true openness and through that I feel empowered to truly make independent and authentic choices in my life—endlessly more free from all concepts I learned about what it means to be good, successful, nice, cool, whatever. I feel like I am being showed the source of everything beneficial one could look for in my own mind, and more and more I realise I have access to it in each moment.
I warmly recommend everyone who feels slightly interested to find out more about this magnificently warm and empowering movement that has given me newfound trust in the benefit and power of the human race!
Beate in Sweden.